


Kinky Fences

by covetsubjugation



Series: The Infamous Story of 'The Squad' [9]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gen, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-04
Updated: 2016-07-04
Packaged: 2018-07-20 02:31:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7387051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/covetsubjugation/pseuds/covetsubjugation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"<b>aaron burr</b><br/>I’m fine with either</p><p><b>baguette fucker</b><br/>you can’t hear us since you went back to your own dorm<br/>but alex just groaned like he was being shot</p><p><b>fight me</b><br/>CHOOSE<br/>YOU CAN’T JUST SIT ON THE FENCE FOREVER<br/>THE FENCE WILL LITERALLY POKE UP YOUR ASS"</p><p>*<br/>Alexander and Aaron are essentially the new Ross and Rachel. Hangovers are a bitch.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kinky Fences

**the angelica squad**  
_aaron burr, angel, baguette fucker, disney god, eliza, fight me, get ur own dicc, peggy_

 **disney god**  
WHO FUCKING SCREAMED

 **get ur own dicc**  
WHO IS FUCKING SCREAMING

 **baguette fucker**  
that would be alexander and burr

 **get ur own dicc**  
oh  
that’s acceptable then

 **disney god**  
NO IT IS FUCKING NOT  
WHO DARE ROUSES THE SON OF ODIN

 **baguette fucker**  
hercules wasn’t the son of odin  
babe that’s not even the same mythology

 **disney god**  
POINT STILL MOTHERFUCKING STANDS

 **angel**  
@ lord give me strength we could hear that scream from over here

 **eliza**  
at least we know alex is a screamer

 **disney god**  
TOO FUCKING EARLY

 **fight me**  
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 **aaron burr**  
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
WHY AM I NAKED

 **fight me**  
WHY AM I NAKED  
WHY AM I NAKED NEXT TO BURR  
WHYWHYWHYWHYWHY

 **get ur own dicc**  
you guys got very drunk yesterday while out with washington

 **aaron burr**  
HE SAW ME DRUNK????????????

 **angel**  
i have never seen burr type in all caps before this is so funny im screenshotting this

 **fight me**  
I AM STILL FUCKING CONCERNED WHY I AM NAKED NEXT TO YOU  
WHAT DID YOU DO

 **aaron burr**  
WHAT DID I DO? WHAT DID YOU DO?!?!?!?!  
SWEET JESUS I WANT TO DIE @ DEATH COME FOR ME NOW I BEG

 **fight me**  
FUCK YOU I AM NOT THAT BAD IN BED

 **aaron burr**  
THAT IS NOT THE POINT ALEXANDER YOUR EGO IS LITERALLY NOT THE POINT RIGHT NOW

 **get ur own dicc  
** heeheehee pointy

 **baguette fucker**  
they literally fight like a married couple even while sober

 **fight me**  
NUMBER ONE WE ARE NOT MARRIED  
AT LEAST I HOPE NOT I REMEMBER FUCK ALL FROM LAST NIGHT  
@ **aaron burr** I REFUSE TO BE ROSS AND RACHEL I CAN’T HANDLE THAT  
NUMBER TWO I THINK I’M STILL SLIGHTLY DRUNK  
OH GOD I WANT TO THROW UP

 **aaron burr**  
STOP TYPING IN CAPS IT HURTS MY EYES

 **fight me**  
YOU’RE TYPING IN CAPS

 **disney god**  
alex if you’re gonna be sick you might as well you’re in your own apartment  
oh there he goes  
he just streaked to the toilet

 **baguette fucker**  
what happened to not wanting to see Things

 **disney god**  
alex doesn’t count  
and if we’re in a poly squad i should expect to see Things

 **baguette fucker**  
then why did it count last night

 **fight me**  
CAN ONE OF YOU HELP ME INSTEAD OF TALKING ABOUT PENISES

 **disney god**  
please alex there are children present

 **get ur own dicc**  
excuse me i am only a year younger

 **disney god**  
i never specifically mentioned your name but if the shoe fits…

 **fight me**  
STILL NOT HELPING

 **get ur own dicc**  
oh rite  
omw

 **baguette fucker**  
you know without context burr groaning in the room sounds very wrong

 **eliza**  
excuse me if i can’t say things neither can you  
otherwise it is just discrimination

 **peggy**  
hello all you motherfuckers  
the phone woke me up with its vibrating  
also are none of you taking care of burr

 **get ur own dicc**  
we don’t like burr

 **peggy**  
you will like burr even less if he throws up on alex’s sheets

 **fight me**  
GET HIM OUT OF THERE

 **disney god**  
i’ll do it  
i can probably carry him

 **aaron burr**  
pls don’t ill throw up on u

 **angel**  
holy shit i didn’t know it was possible for burr to type in all lower caps either

 **eliza**  
so many firsts

 **fight me**  
DID WE SLEEP TOGETHER THO  
THAT’S NOT HOW OUR FIRST TIME SHOULD BE

 **peggy**  
so you expected there would be a first time? 

**fight me**  
im still drunk ignore all words out of my mouth

 **get ur own dicc**  
alex dear there are no words coming out of your mouth rn  
just vomit

 **angel**  
ew tmi

 **get ur own dicc**  
herc literally said he was running to the bathroom  
what did you think was coming out

 **angel**  
I JUST DIDN’T WANT MENTAL IMAGES OKAY

 **aaron burr**  
point still stands  
did alex and i do anything last night

 **eliza**  
to tell or not to tell that is the question

 **aaron burr**  
eliza pls

 **fight me**  
rt

 **get ur own dicc**  
…

 **angel**  
…

 **peggy**  
…

 **get ur own dicc**  
…

 **fight me**  
PLEASE

 **aaron burr**  
capital letter s i want to cry

 **eliza**  
nah you didn’t  
when you two got home last night  
for some reason you just stripped??? and then got into bed

 **fight me**  
so nothing happened?

 **baguette fucker**  
well you fought with each other  
and then you two both somehow agreed to go on a date

 **fight me**  
WHAT

 **aaron burr**  
WHAT  
ow  
save me from this hangover

 **baguette fucker**  
you guys said and i quote  
“go to hell burr”  
“bfbsrmphch”  
“iron ic seeing as u r already there”  
“see you in h ell then u heathen”  
“is that a date i accept” 

**fight me**  
wait who said bfbsrmphch

 **baguette fucker**  
burr

 **aaron burr**  
how bad is it with washington

 **eliza**  
er…  
he used your phone to text us to bring you home

 **aaron burr**  
oh no

 **peggy**  
but then laf hit on him so it’s not so bad for you?  
he will only remember laf tbh

 **aaron burr**  
lafayette hit on him??  
oh no  
you can’t see it but know it’s capitalised

 **angel**  
speaking of which  
did you guys actually text washington last night

 **disney god**  
oh  
shit  
whoops? 

**angel**  
men

 **disney god**  
can’t argue with you there

*

 **Boss Man**  
_last seen at 09:07_

quick question  
how screwed am i right now

Get some rest, Alexander  
Give my wishes to Burr

*

 **the angelica squad**  
_aaron burr, angel, baguette fucker, disney god, eliza, fight me, get ur own dicc, peggy_

 **fight me**  
he doesn’t seem to bad  
but im cushioned by alcohol  
he just said to get some rest  
and he said the same to burr

 **disney god**  
burr just kinda went back to sleep so you can tell washington burr is taking his advice

 **baguette fucker**  
you should sleep too alex

 **fight me**  
i kinda just want food

 **get ur own dicc**  
hot and greasy?  
coming right up

 **fight me**  
blessed the blessed being that is john laurens

 **peggy**  
#eloquent

 **fight me**  
don’t drag me rn  
im still drunk  
i can't do it back  
it isn’t a fair competiton

 **baguette fucker**  
for the love of fuck alex at least sit down on the couch instead of standing up and texting

 **fight me**  
sure i love to fuck

 **baguette fucker**  
sweet jesus  
it’s okay i got him  
we’re going to gently place him on the couch  
shhh slowly drift off to sleep hammie

 **get ur own dicc**  
speaking of ham we are out of bacon

 **disney god**  
laf it’s your turn to buy grocceries

 **baguette fucker**  
i can’t read suddenly i don’t know

 **angel**  
seriously

 **disney god**  
laf

 **baguette fucker**  
okay but someone has to take over as alex’s pillow

 **eliza**  
omw

 **get ur own dicc**  
you live on the other side of campus

 **eliza**  
so

 **get ur own dicc**  
actually nah  
forget it  
laf go

 **baguette fucker**  
ew outside  
ew people  
*

 **fight me**  
why is star trek so far awayyy

 **angel**  
i think alex is back to normal again

 **aaron burr**  
That was out of the blue

 **baguette fucker**  
The Boys Are Back

 **get ur own dicc**  
no  
i do want to watch star trek tho

 **peggy**  
hold up

 **disney god**  
they don’t love you like i love you

 **peggy**  
hercules yes but no  
star trek or star wars

_aaron burr has left the group_

_fight me has added aaron burr to the group_

**fight me**  
burr please it’s an innocent question  
just choose a side

 **eliza**  
STAR WARS

 **get ur own dicc**  
STAR TREK

 **baguette fucker**  
STAR TREK

 **angel**  
STAR WARS

 **disney god**  
STAR WARS

 **angel**  
HOW DARE

 **baguette fucker**  
SINNERS ALL OF YOU STAR WARS FREAKS

 **aaron burr**  
this is why i left

 **fight me**  
do you guys wanna watch star trek tho  
i know those who said star trek want to  
but star wars people

 **eliza**  
yeah ok  
i like popcorn

 **aaron burr**  
oh no

 **fight me**  
SWEET OR SALTY  
SALT

 **baguette fucker**  
SALT

 **get ur own dicc**  
NO SATAN ABSOLUTELY NOT  
SWEET

 **disney god**  
WE’VE HAD THIS ARGUMENT BEFORE  
SWEET

 **eliza**  
SALT

 **angel**  
SALT

 **peggy**  
SALT  
SWEET IS FOR BORING VANILLA PEOPLE  
BURR WHAT DO YOU LIKE

 **aaron burr**  
I’m fine with either

 **baguette fucker**  
you can’t hear us since you went back to your own dorm  
but alex just groaned like he was being shot

 **fight me**  
CHOOSE  
YOU CAN’T JUST SIT ON THE FENCE FOREVER  
THE FENCE WILL LITERALLY POKE UP YOUR ASS

 **disney god**  
ew what

 **eliza**  
kinky

 **get ur own dicc**  
kinky  
@ **eliza** ayyyy

 **eliza**  
~finger guns~

 **angel**  
did you just  
im telling dad to disown you

 **aaron burr**  
@ **fight me** That was the most disturbing thing I ever read

 **fight me**  
I can widen your horizons if you want

 **angel**  
RIGHT THAT’S ENOUGH OUT OF YOU TWO FOR TODAY  
i like it better when you guys thought you were sleeping together

 **fight me**  
@ **aaron burr** (((((((((((((((((((((((((;

 **aaron burr**  
…  
(;

 **peggy**  
i’m sorry but did he just  
what

**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr](http://www.bisexualexhamilton.tumblr.com) is here, please leave nice messages if you like this weird series.


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